Strength, character, and common sense.
These are words that, in my opinion, describe people from a different time; a generation of people that never knew what Facebook or “social media” was. A generation of people that worked with their hands and lived within their means. People that actually sat down at a dinner table and talked to one another. These words no longer describe most people anymore. Honestly; I see so many people that rarely spend time with their kids, that only talk about their spouse when they are fighting, and that spend more time posting about their last bowel movement on Facebook than they spend really living life.
What have we done to our daughters? Girls are taught from the minute they can understand adults that they have to look cute, be sweet, and like pink, just so that they can get what they want. But then we spend so much time trying to make them believe they are better than boys; that they can do everything a man does and do it better. Women want equal rights, equal pay, equal everything— but get pissed when they have to work the long hours, do the heavy lifting, and not get a constant stream of “Atta boy”s from the boss. We want our women to be soft, pretty, good wives and better mothers, but yet they still have to be able to “break the glass ceiling” and run the show. How many of you gals feel like you have to balance home life and work, and yet wonder how the hell you are going to make any of it happen? I don’t think it is fair that we feel like we have to take care of everyone else around us, yet if we take five minutes to ourselves, the guilt is as bad as if you had started the neighbor’s house on file. We have to learn to let it go. We have to teach our daughters to take care of themselves, be strong, and if they want to be girly, know that it is ok. It is ok not to like jumping in the mud puddle; just as it is ok to wear jeans and t-shirts and not own a single dress. They aren’t boys; we have to stop treating them like they should be. Let them be who they want to be. If you want to shatter that glass ceiling, great! If you want to be a wife and mommy, or ride horses all day, or be a beautician, or a brain surgeon, do it! Don’t let others stop you from doing what makes you, you.
When a woman is confident, she can tend to come off as bossy or bitchy; when a man is confident, people swoon over his swagger. Being confident has to start on the inside — instead of from the clothes and shoes covering our bodies. Sure, pretty undies help us feel sexy, and that in turn, helps us feel more confident… but why? Why does our confidence come from how we look? I don’t think it is right that when women are intelligent and work their asses off to prove it, that they are treated poorly for that. Guys, if you don’t like that a gal knows more than you do, that’s your fault… pick up a book and learn something- you can do it too!
Most of all, we could all do well to get off social media once in a while. Stop enrolling your kids in every sport or church-function all year long. Stop whining about how busy you are- if you are too busy to sit down and talk to the people you love more than through a text message, you need to change something. Just because you are “connected” to the world all the time doesn’t mean you shouldn’t unplug and see the world though your own eyes instead of a camera. Stop volunteering for everything so people will think you are a good person. Good people are good because they don’t toot their own horns, and believe it or not, other people see this too. Just do what makes you happy, not what makes you look good.
I hope you find peace within yourself, and learn to love yourself for who you are. Hell, I am pushing on the door into a new decade and there are a lot of days I have no idea what the hell I am doing with my life. I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up. What I do know, though, is that I have two little girls that look to me for guidance, support, and love. I will do my best to be confident in front of them (even when my legs quiver with fear), to use common sense, and to be kind even when it is really hard. Because someday, they will be adults that will be trying to figure all this out- and I want them to have a headstart on being a decent human being. I can’t imagine what life will look like when they are my age, but I know that as long as their dad and I stick to our morals and values, they will be able to handle everything this great big old world throws at them. I hope you can too.
Much love ~ Richelle